Some things are unthinkable. We just can’t conceive of them happening. And sometimes that’s a problem.
As, for instance, in situations too awful for us to bear. This is what happens in trauma when someone experiences something unspeakably terrible. And because they have no words for it, it isn’t integrated into their lives. Unlike a normal memory that is processed and understood, a traumatic experience remains unprocessed – raw and disturbing. I recently heard it vividly described as being like ‘a foreign body in the psyche’.
Finding something unthinkable can also create problems in relation to sin. For when we can’t bring ourselves to believe someone could possibly have behaved so badly, we end up deaf to the cries of those who have been sinned against.
That’s why domestic abuse and overbearing Christian leadership frequently go unchallenged far longer than they should. But if we believed our Bibles, we would know our great capacity for sin. Reflecting on the extent of the Fall, we read that ‘The Lord saw how great the wickedness of the human race had become on the earth, and that every inclination of the thoughts of the human heart was only evil all the time’ (Gen. 6:5). And though a believer’s heart may be regenerate, the Spirit still battles with the flesh: ‘They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want.’ (Gal. 5:17).
But there is another, rather different, problem with finding things unthinkable. A problem that relates to faith. Specifically, the faith to believe that things could be different. For, faced with a broken relationship, or deeply ingrained habit, or failing marriage, or deep bitterness and resentment, it can be hard to think things will ever change. And finding change unthinkable means we neither pray for, nor work toward, change.
Some change, of course is astonishingly difficult and progress very slow. What’s more, some reconciliations are neither safe, nor wise. For until an oppressor acknowledges their sin, and turns from it, reconciliation cannot even be on the agenda.
Can’t conceive of change
In other situations, however, our own inability to conceive of change can get in the way. We are stuck because we cannot imagine breaking our own longstanding habit; stuck because we cannot think of that friendship restored. In such circumstances, to borrow a phrase from Jeremiah, God might want to say to us: ‘I am the Lord, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me?’ (Jer. 32:27). Indeed, Jesus Himself might say to us: ‘Truly I tell you, if anyone says to this mountain, “Go, throw yourself into the sea”, and does not doubt in their heart but believes that what they say will happen, it will be done for them’ (Mark 11:23). This isn’t a blank cheque to fill in as we wish, but we know that God wants reconciliation and forgiveness, He wants marriages to thrive and sanctification to grow. He is far more committed to our growth in Christlikeness than we will ever be. He sent Christ to the cross that we might be holy.
God restoring broken relationships, and bringing freedom from life-dominating habits, and rescuing failing marriages shouldn’t be unthinkable to us. We should pray for such things with conviction and engage in pastoral ministry persuaded that God works powerfully for change.
In His encounter with the rich young ruler, Jesus acknowledged just how hard it is for the rich to enter the kingdom of God. As unthinkable as a camel going through the eye of a needle. But when His disciples despaired and asked ‘Who then can be saved?’, Jesus replied: ‘What is impossible with man is possible with God’ (Luke 18:23-27).
Pastoral ministry requires us to think the unthinkable. Only then can we begin to sense the pain of those we seek to help, and only then will we see the depth of sin and oppression that lurks in the shadows. But thinking the unthinkable is also needed if we are to cast a vision of deeper discipleship, defeated sin and changed hearts. Our God is determined to conform us to the image of Christ (Rom. 8:29). We ought to think that possible.
