Preaching and talking are different. But although we know that, sometimes we seem to forget.
Most of us listen to sermons on a regular basis, and if we’ve been a Christian for any length of time, our sermon count will be in the hundreds, if not thousands. Maybe it is unsurprising then that, perhaps without quite realising it, preaching mode can begin to feature in our conversations about Jesus. And that can be deeply unhelpful.
It quickly changes the dynamic from ‘talking with’ to ‘talking at’. Preaching, quite rightly, brings a measure of authority. Preachers declare the word of God. There is often a prophetic edge – a ‘thus says the Lord’ element. When that dynamic finds its way into conversation it will often land badly. A measure of authority can be appropriate in personal conversation – we might think of situations of church discipline – but pastoral conversations normally involve collaboration. One person helps another explore an issue and together, before the Lord, they search the Scriptures and find a way forward.
Much, of course, is similar in both realms. Both pastoral conversations and preaching depend on the same living word of God – a word that is both reliable and sufficient. In both contexts the Scriptures are always relevant and can always be trusted. (We may not always be very good at discerning how Scripture speaks to contemporary issues, but that’s a different matter.)
And, whether it happens in response to a sermon or as a result of a conversation, understanding the things of God always requires the simultaneous work of God, because spiritual truth is ‘discerned only through the Spirit’ (1 Cor. 2:14), and humility on our part because it is necessary to ‘humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you’ (James 1:21).
But there are so many differences. First, good conversation requires us to listen. A good pastor does, of course, know their flock. They will, in a general sense, have listened. But the listening in conversation is specific. We cannot speak the truth of God accurately and faithfully in conversation unless we begin with careful and thoughtful listening.
This means that in conversation questions will always be more prominent. A preacher may use rhetorical questions (and occasionally, to their surprise, find them being answered out loud!), but preaching is mostly didactic. It is the delivery of truth. It states and declares. It appeals and exhorts. Conversation can involve those things, but usually questions are prominent. For, in conversation, inviting understanding through questions is generally more effective than stating truth through statements. It is striking how often in the gospel accounts we see Jesus engaging people with questions.
Another difference is the expression of compassion and love. Preachers can seem warm or cold, compassionate or emotionally detached. But the sense we have of such things will be general. In conversation it is personal. Love, and compassion, arrives with our name written on it. In conversation, speech is personal and by sharing our heart we communicate love.
It is also worth noting that conversation gets interrupted. It may have been different for others, but in my context preaching generally gets delivered uninterrupted. Conversation simply isn’t like that. And if preaching is like music performed in a concert solo, conversation is more like jazz where a musician is constantly adapting to what’s going on around them. Conversations take unexpected turns. A new piece of information or an expression of emotion suddenly casts a completely new light on things, and what needs talking about is no longer what it seemed.
We recognise preaching as a skill to be learnt. Seeing conversation that way is rather less intuitive. Yet if we are to be faithful to Paul’s instruction to speak the truth in love, conversations probably needs more attention than we generally think.
