RID OF MY DISGRACE
Hope and healing for victims of sexual assault
By Justin Holcomb, Lindsey Holcomb . Crossway. 272 pages. £10.50
ISBN 978 1 433 515 989
This is a book about sexual assault and recovery from it. Justin and Lindsey are both US professionals — they seem to know their stuff and, importantly, they know their Bibles, which makes this a real help to those who face the issues the book tackles.
The authors are probably quoting US statistics when they say that one in four women and one in six men have been sexually assaulted, but presumably the data is not so different here in the UK. If that is so, it means there are at least a few people in your church who have suffered in this area (you?) and may need wise biblical counsel. You'll find it here. This is the kind of book that in certain circumstances you might give to someone, but more useful I would think is for pastors and church workers to read it and understand some of the issues at stake.
Sin and consequences
It's not an easy read, of course, being honest — as it is — about the reality of sexual assault. But neither is it sensationalist. And it is thoroughly biblical, conservative, in the best sense of the word, when it comes to sin, identity, salvation, grace and redemption. All of this combines to make it a really useful resource. The middle section is where the book is most helpful: the authors are really clear about the consequences of sexual assault (with chapters on denial, distorted self-image, shame, guilt, anger and despair). And the book is strong on the grace given us in the gospel whereupon we take on a new identity in Christ and all that means. There's a robust section on forgiveness too — what it is and what it isn't and why we can deal with hurt even when there is no repentance on the part of those who have hurt us.
Of particular value is the insight that secular help can go so far but will not provide the ultimate answers: ‘In an attempt to counter your negative self-image, others may encourage you to see yourself in a story of self-love, self-reliance, and self-healing. But the identity that comes from that story is even darker disgrace and even more pain in the long term because the self-made illusions about self cannot be maintained’. It is saying something that it comes with endorsements from a variety of traditions in the US, including CCEF, Acts 29, Westminster West, White Horse Inn and Sam Storms. In other words, it is sound and useful, crossing tribal boundaries. Don't wait for a trauma to come to the surface in your church. You need to read this before the event. Painful then, but enormously useful and a glowing jewel among the paucity of material written on this subject.
