Shadows of grace dancing through adoption

THE WILD TRACK
By Margaret Reynolds
Penguin. 320 pages. £16.99 (hardback)
ISBN 978 1 529 176 612

‘You get to the place and you think it is the place; you think you have arrived where you are meant to be’ (Prologue).

The author of this beautifully written memoir is single, successful and has spent her adult life pursuing academic goals. She is lauded in numerous circles, and is often heard on various radio broadcasts giving opinion and insight.

She had in many ways ‘arrived’, but – as told through this autobiographical narrative – she had yet to reach the place, ‘the wild track’, hidden amidst the unspoken, unseen and surprising directions that her life took as she embarked on the pursuit of adopting a child.

As Reynolds considers the possibility of becoming a parent, she reflects on the nature of motherhood. As a literary scholar, snippets of poems and references to the literary landscape of various decades pepper the prose as she considers how mothers are perceived, what the role is, and how women over the course of time have navigated the joys and challenges. There is a difference, she notes, in deliberately taking a step outside of her current plough line in order to become a parent. It is not simple, and there are numerous hoops to jump through, lengthy life examinations and frequent false starts. It means that motherhood for Reynolds is something that she has sifted through, considered from many angles and mulled over in different ways to those who naturally conceive, or choose to adopt from within the typical family unit.

Whatever we think about the nature of this adoption, the act of welcoming, loving and sacrificially serving a child born to another woman is something to be admired and praised. There are revelations throughout this memoir which make it clear that Reynolds is not perfect, but the honesty with which she shares her journey towards motherhood is disarming and vulnerable. As the social services comb through her life to determine whether she is suitable to be an adoptive parent, there are self-revelations that cause our author to redouble her commitment and seek to change for the better.

We come to admire Reynolds, while acknowledging her foibles, and – as with all adoption – it is a beautiful thing to behold. The unconditional love and welcome offered to the child is full of grace. Grace that should catapult any Christian watching into a consideration of our unendingly gracious, abundantly loving, never-forsaking God.

The shadows of grace dance across this memoir, despite the author making no reference to the God of the heavens and the earth, and remind us of the magnificent privilege of being adopted, in Christ, into God’s family.

Reynolds admirably pursues this worthy cause, but God’s pursuit of us causes hers to pale. While she is ‘match-made’ with her child and gets to select according to a criteria, God, out of love, pursues sinners whose backs are turned and whose rebellion is in full flow. Reynolds’ home and the life she makes for her adoptive daughter is desirable, but we are headed for eternity with our heavenly Father who loves us perfectly.

‘But then, in a space that is entirely separate and specific, you just listen, in a mediation that open out beyond the moment, to wherever the moment takes you on the wild track of its own intimate revelations. You never know where it will lead’ (Prologue).

The ‘wild track’ term comes from the world of radio production and describes the recording of the ambient noise, the unheard sounds to which we don’t deliberately listen. Reynolds’ ‘wild track’ is the life-shaping journey into parenthood that lands her in a ‘moment’ that she had never expected.

Perhaps, as Christians, our ‘wild track’ can sometimes be our status as adopted children of the living God. We know it, but we don’t talk about it, we don’t praise God for it often, and so it slips into being background noise that slides past our ears unnoticed. But I see this picture play out in this secular but beautiful memoir, the tune gets louder and I’m praising God all the more for glorious, permanent, unchanging adoption into His perfect, loved, eternal family.