Dear Editor,
I could not agree more with your correspondent on hidden abuse (July en). It is the cover-up, lies and deceit that follow the original abuse which damages our faith and trust in the Christian church most.
It is now three years since Thirtyone:eight challenged a generation of conservative evangelical leaders to step aside so that the influence they wield through their formal and informal networks can be replaced with a healthy leadership culture and effective accountability structures (Independent Lessons Learned Review for ECW, p.93 – my paraphrase and summary rather than a direct quote). What progress has there been?
It is still the case that to avoid further harm from those who should protect you, the only sensible option is to remain quiet and suck up your pain. If you complain, church members will view you with suspicion; your complaints will be whitewashed by the trustees appointed by your abuser. You will be asked for evidence and then told that you write too much. You will be told to act Christianly, forgive and move on. They’ll question your membership; you will be dropped from ministry and told that you are too unwell to continue (without anyone asking you how you feel about it); they will say that you are too angry to be taken seriously; and then churches will employ their ‘Christian’ solicitors who, conveniently forgetting their advertised Biblical ethics, will defend the malpractice of the powerful against you, because trustees can dip into church funds to pay for them. But who will advocate for you?
If there is anything we have learnt from Alan Bates, it is the need to unite our voices. If your correspondent or anyone else wants to be put in touch with me, perhaps at the very least, we can cry together rather than crying alone. And perhaps we can pool our experience so that others are heard and believed. Otherwise, victims shall continue to be called ‘troublemakers’ and abusers shall continue to be called ‘brother evangelicals’.
Yours sincerely,
Name withheld
Guilt & shame: The gospel is big enough to address both
Note: this article contains references to abuse.When Leanne first shared her story in our women's group, the room fell …