“I am not sure I believe in Christianity” or “I don’t want to come to church anymore,” are some of the words that Christian parents dread hearing. When they come there is a mixture of feelings: disappointment, sadness, failure and shame. These feelings in turn produce our own questions: “Where did I go wrong?” or “Why am I such a bad parent or such a useless Christian?”
All of this makes some Christian parents feel as if they have woefully missed bringing up the three cherries of the slot machine of parenting. Paul Mallard has written a wise and warmly pastoral book that addresses the uncertainty, guilt and pain of Christian parents whose children walk away from Jesus.
Mallard takes the reader for a walk through Scripture to examine the questions that Christian parents ask when their children decide to turn their backs on the faith they have been taught.
The book addresses false guilt arising from superficial application of Scripture, and the hurt that can arise when other Christians fail to be sensitive with Christian parents struggling with children who are not walking with the Lord.
In the chapter “Am I still allowed to love him?” Mallard deals with the how parents in recent decades have needed to increasingly navigate issues of addiction, same-sex attraction and confusion over gender. He deals sensitively with questions of how to maintain a loving prayerful relationship with children when they make life choices because of these issues.
The author is particularly helpful on what it means to learn from our experiences of pain and to keep going in our prayers for our children even when no apparent results are forthcoming. He writes movingly of the five decades he spent praying for his mother to become a Christian.
Each chapter concludes with helpful questions for further reflection or discussion.
This book is Biblical, honest, realistic and practical. All parents will find it helpful but those who carry the ache of children who seem far from the Lord will find in its pages much to inform, encourage and comfort them.
WHEN CHILDREN WALK AWAY FROM JESUS: Comfort & Hope for Parents of Prodigals By Paul Mallard The Good Book Co. 156 pages. £ 8.99 ISBN 978 1 802 543 766
